Sharing your story (and mine) - a request to my readers, please read

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Yesterday I was having one of those days where I was really feeling like throwing in the towel on the whole blog thing.  Why do I continue writing?  It takes up precious time and I oftentimes struggle with what to actually wrote.  I am not sure that many people are still reading other than the person who Googles and randomly stumbles upon one of my posts related to: "does CrossFit cause divorce?", "diastasis recti", or "do long cycles cause miscarriage?".  If I pulled my blog out of the blogisphere today, would anyone know or even care?

Since I started blogging, back in the spring of 2012, my content and tone have changed quite a bit.  I have gone from a very bitter and jaded "baby-less" person that blogged about miscarriage, temping, and pee-sticks to a mommy that blogs about her post-baby body self-esteem, running, and CrossFit issues.  The pre-baby and post-baby blogs are almost completely different audience types and, with the exception of people who have been following me for a while and have gone through similar circumstances, I am not sure how many new and regular readers I have.  What is the point of continuing?  For my own personal health and well-being?  If that was the case, couldn't I just write everything down in a private journal?  I seriously ask myself this all of the time.

Yesterday, I remembered to check my blog email box for the first time in several months.  Besides mounds of spam from people trying to get me to give them a shout out or let them "guest post", I had a few emails from a few different women who were writing to seek my advice regarding situations that they were in right now that I had once been in.  I was reminded of why I continue to keep my blog and the associated email box going.  For as many people that no longer follow me and read my posts, there continue to be a few people who come across my blog that find it helpful and comforting.  They have found themselves in an unfortunate position and the cosmic powers of Google have brought them to my tiny little space where they have been able to read about what I have gone through, relate either somewhat or completely, and apply things that I learned or tried to help them with their situations.  I seriously love that I am able to help even just one person a year because that is one less person who feels like they are dealing with a similar issue, alone.

One thing that a lot of these women that write to me have in common (and definitely how I once felt) is that they are alone in their situations and in their feelings about their situation.  They feel like the time is going so slowly and that they will never "be on the other side".  I am sure that there will always be extenuating circumstances that will make it medically impossible (for one reason or another) for someone who has miscarried many times, to have a child.  That said, out of all of the women who have ever taken the time to write to me personally, I cannot think of one that has followed up with me, that has not be able to eventually have a baby...somehow.  This makes me so happy.

I know that I currently don't have anyone's "permission" to anonymously post their story (and would NEVER do so unless I was given permission), but I would really love to share some stories of other ladies, who have been in similar shoes to my own, on my blog.  Maybe once a month or every other month or something like that.  I think that reading stories of others that have "been through it" helps those that are "still going through it" actually get through it.  Having some hope is half the battle and if I can provide hope to others by sharing positive stories, I am doing a world of good.

So, to my readers, if you have written to me before and still follow me, have never written but follow, or have stumbled upon my blog for the first time and have gone through a similar situation as me, please write to me (and either tell me your story or give me permission to anonymously use your story that we have already emailed about) and I will share in a dedicated post.  Your story is important and may help someone else who is struggling right now.  This isn't limited to just miscarriage, either, although that is the subject that I seem to get the most response and readers for.  I know I write about other topics such as body image (such as diastasis recti), nursing, and marriage issues, too, so feel free to write to me about that.   Share your struggles and things that you have tried that have helped you get through and continue on.  Please think about it.  I may be putting together a dedicated page on my blog to share the stories of others depending on the response that I get.  You could really help someone, too.  

For now, I am going to continue writing and responding to emails.  I am just not ready to give it up yet, I guess.  I enjoy writing and connecting with others.  Since my day job isn't really "helping" anyone, it is nice to know that I am possibly helping others in this way, even if it is just a very small amount.  


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6 Responses to “Sharing your story (and mine) - a request to my readers, please read”

  1. I think you're hitting the same point all ALI bloggers hit. The post baby stage of parenting after infertility and trying to figure out where you fit in this community, let alone the blogosphere. I'm struggling with this too, especially since a lot of my current drama has nothing to do with infertility or loss.

    I love your idea of using this space for others to share their stories. For many, it's the first step they may need to feel less alone.

  2. Here from the IComLeaveWe. I haven't read you before, but I love your idea of writing and responding to emails. And your comment about "would anyone miss my blog if I stopped?" I think you will have readers who would miss you but maybe you don't even know about them. And the most important person anyway is you. Would YOU miss it if you stopped?

  3. Also stopping by from ICLW and agree with Mali, there are probably people who read and just can't think of the right thing to say to leave a comment. :) I really like your idea of letting people tell their stories, some people really want to share but don't want to do their own blog.

  4. I love blogs that share stories that aren't their own. Good luck with it, I'm sure it will be a success.

  5. Cristy makes a good point. What keeps me bogging is that there IS some feedback. With just a journal, you wouldn't have that, and without that, I wouldn't ever write in a journal. I just wouldn't get around to it. I like that I have this record, such that it is.

  6. "For as many people that no longer follow me and read my posts, there continue to be a few people who come across my blog that find it helpful and comforting."

    THIS!! This is why I continue to write :) I think I lost followers when I changed my blog name and went self-hosted, but I still write because I hope that someone feeling lost and unsure will be able to find it and know they aren't alone. I felt that way for so long after my miscarriage. I like to think I've helped one or two people through my writing.