I just got back from a terrible trip to the shopping center.  I had to get some ramekins and a table cloth for Christmas dinner from H.omegoods.   I also had to get food for Christmas Eve, Christmas morning, and Christmas dinner from W.hole F.oods.  I also had to stop at the "regular" grocery store to get some things that they don't sell at WF like K.eurig & S.wiffer).  Now, I normally hate grocery shopping and recently I have been doing it alone every week because my husband has been working on our new bamboo floors.  It is bad enough to tag team it, but braving it alone at the holidays while pregnant is even less fun.

First of all it took circling the parking lot several times to find ANY parking spot.  I ended up stalking a mom and her daughter for their spot.  Every store was jam packed with people picking over the last few available items.  Luckily, I got what I needed from the regular grocery store and H.omegoods.

Then I battled to leave the parking lot to go on to the next one.  Somehow I always have 2 SUVs on either side of me so that I can't see when I am backing out.  It never fails.  I like having a small car, but not in a parking lot.

W.hole F.oods was a DISASTER area.  They had police directing traffic even though there is a light.  I was lucky to get in and find a spot their fairly fast as someone was just pulling out.  No shopping carts at the door so I waited for someone to bring theirs back.  Then I realized I lost my shopping list.  Somewhere between the last 2 stores I must have dropped it.  F*ck.  I was able to do most of my shopping from memory though.  The store was packed with the usual WF a-holes.  I complain about the bargain grocery store having too many illegal immigrants or people buying gallons and gallons of fruit punch with EBT, but WF has mostly stuck up assholes who don't care if they plant their cart right in the middle of a crowded isle so no one can get by.  Also, for some reason they stock the shelves during the day on Sunday so that is an added obstacle...EVERYWHERE.

People at WF are also known to shop while wearing headphones or while talking on the phone.  Today, some jerk-off guy was having a fight with his wife on the phone and nailed me with his cart and just kept on walking and yelling at his wife.  He didn't even hear me yell "ASSHOLE" at him as I tried to keep it together.  I always move my cart to the very side of the isle or in a place where it won't be in the way to everyone passing through.  He had plenty of room to get by me without hitting me.

When I finally had thrown (what I thought) was everything into the cart and made my way to the checkout I realized I forgot freaking kale.  I ran back through the sea of shoppers to the produce and thew the first one I could grab into a bag and ran back to the thoroughly annoyed cashier.  They packed all my stuff into 4 of my 6 cloth bags making them about 50 lbs each.  I guess I don't look pregnant, just fat.  $266 bucks was the damage.  WTF.

I made it back to my car and loaded the lead bags into the trunk.  Someone was already waiting for my spot so I hopped in my car, looked both ways, and then started backing out, only to have another c-you-next-Tuesday lay on her horn as she came flying through the parking lot.  I continued backing up anyways, to give the person who was backing up traffic on the other side my spot, and she continued to obnoxiously honk at me.  I gave her the middle finger as I peeled away to the exit.  Seriously, she couldn't wait 2 seconds for me to back out?!

As I drove away to my house, I saw the crazy lines of traffic trying to get in and out of the shopping centers.  Ugh.  Completely miserable.  Makes me question the point of this "jolly holiday".  Everyone seems pretty miserable to me and no one seems to have any "holiday spirit".

When I got home I took in a load of stuff only to remember that I forgot something.  My husband came in and asked if I needed help and I burst into tears.  Like hysterical tears so bad that he didn't understand what I was saying.  Maybe it is the hormonal overload and maybe it was the sea of jerks, but I just had enough and the thought of going out again was too much to take.  It took me a long hug to settle down.  Merry f*cking Christmas.

Bah Humbug Source